30 November 2010

all eye want this summer

Question Time!

What effectively conceals the signs of a. ageing, b. one too many tequila shots (and last night's old makeup you passed out in as a consequence of t-shotting) c. stealing glances at attractive chaps in passing, and in some cases d. your identity (offering a freedom whilst engaging in activities others find offensive and/or 'not very neighbourly'*)?

Francoise Hardy guessed it**.

Cue the sunglasses.

I myself am filled with the giddies just thinking which I'll use to conceal my face this summer.

After a gruelling selection process I came to the conclusion that these are my absolute top picks.

These Janz and Cooper Florals are probably the grooviest specs I've ever had the pleasureof coming across. Unfortunately they are valued at just slightly out of my price range and so at this stage I will be fantasizing about wearing them, paired with a white cotton dress and frolicking through the streets of Chippendale fields of wildflowers in soft sunlight, purely from concetrating intently upon this image below.

These Dries Van Noten's Linda Farrow round sunglasses are another true winner in my eyes.
I simply cannot wait to look like I'm channeling the lovechild of David Hockney's spectacles and a giraffe.

Sadly I shared this desire with one too many others and the DVN's are no longer.

Not to worry. Also on my wishlist are these incredibles:
Let me introduce you to Betsy.

Betsy, by Aussie brand Isson, is probably the most amazing pair of Aussie made sunnies at the moment. They reflect my favourite time period and my penchant for two-tone round lenses.

When I buy these I know I'll look just like the twin of Jane Birkin or Brigitte Bardot (it's going to be a piece of cake!)

Until then, I leave with you an itemised poster to determine who you want to channel this summer when you're crawling home from the cross in the early hours of the morning. Kanye? Dame Edma? Michael Caine or even Gandi?! The peoples at Moxy Creative put together this nifty little guide. Me, I think I'm a Hockney paired with a mix of Giraffe and Edma.
*In the words of the fair Anna Lou

P.S We're doing our first giveaway next week, so keep your eyes peeled!

05 November 2010

Australia's National Day of Man Repelling

...known to most as The Melbourne Cup.

The only day on the calendar when wearing grotesquely enormous flowers and other assortments of 'art' on your head is deemed not only appropriate, but the way forward.

Those who know me may question my credentials for passing judgement (especially after a slew of unsolicited photographs of me recently surfaced on the interwebs*).

The Melbourne Cup confuses the shit out of me, much like I'm sure this fellow is confused by

a. the notion of acceptable sartorial decision making and

b. his lady friend's decision to wear a visual method of birth control on her head.

I also speculate the relationship he holds with his razor. His beard offends every fibre of my being.

When all sensible sartorial decisions are flung from the window, this propeller could quite literally take her places. (albeit, not likely anywhere heterosexual men are likely to frequent).

*I largely have Paul to thank after he circulated said images of me appearing more like a mental delinquent than a social butterfly, around our office. But on the plus side, at least I don't fall asleep standing up!)

If this picture wasn't enough to blow your eyeballs out of your sockets, some more hand-picked winners committing crimes against my eyeballs to tickle your tastebuds:

Dear Kate, you are beautiful, but your gargoyle-inspired ass-hattery is ludicrous, and you are killing me inside.

Asshats for as far as the eye can see.

pass the peroxide, sista!

**DISCLAIMER: Even though I didn't partake directly in the Melbourne Cup festivities, I will not argue against the champagne breakfast and half day of work we were granted..