all eye want this summer

Question Time!

What effectively conceals the signs of a. ageing, b. one too many tequila shots (and last night's old makeup you passed out in as a consequence of t-shotting) c. stealing glances at attractive chaps in passing, and in some cases d. your identity (offering a freedom whilst engaging in activities others find offensive and/or 'not very neighbourly'*)?

Francoise Hardy guessed it**.

Cue the sunglasses.

I myself am filled with the giddies just thinking which I'll use to conceal my face this summer.

After a gruelling selection process I came to the conclusion that these are my absolute top picks.

These Janz and Cooper Florals are probably the grooviest specs I've ever had the pleasureof coming across. Unfortunately they are valued at just slightly out of my price range and so at this stage I will be fantasizing about wearing them, paired with a white cotton dress and frolicking through the streets of Chippendale fields of wildflowers in soft sunlight, purely from concetrating intently upon this image below.

These Dries Van Noten's Linda Farrow round sunglasses are another true winner in my eyes.
I simply cannot wait to look like I'm channeling the lovechild of David Hockney's spectacles and a giraffe.

Sadly I shared this desire with one too many others and the DVN's are no longer.

Not to worry. Also on my wishlist are these incredibles:
Let me introduce you to Betsy.

Betsy, by Aussie brand Isson, is probably the most amazing pair of Aussie made sunnies at the moment. They reflect my favourite time period and my penchant for two-tone round lenses.

When I buy these I know I'll look just like the twin of Jane Birkin or Brigitte Bardot (it's going to be a piece of cake!)

Until then, I leave with you an itemised poster to determine who you want to channel this summer when you're crawling home from the cross in the early hours of the morning. Kanye? Dame Edma? Michael Caine or even Gandi?! The peoples at Moxy Creative put together this nifty little guide. Me, I think I'm a Hockney paired with a mix of Giraffe and Edma.

*In the words of the fair Anna Lou

P.S We're doing our first giveaway next week, so keep your eyes peeled!

Australia's National Day of Man Repelling

...known to most as The Melbourne Cup.

The only day on the calendar when wearing grotesquely enormous flowers and other assortments of 'art' on your head is deemed not only appropriate, but the way forward.

Those who know me may question my credentials for passing judgement (especially after a slew of unsolicited photographs of me recently surfaced on the interwebs*).

The Melbourne Cup confuses the shit out of me, much like I'm sure this fellow is confused by

a. the notion of acceptable sartorial decision making and

b. his lady friend's decision to wear a visual method of birth control on her head.

I also speculate the relationship he holds with his razor. His beard offends every fibre of my being.

When all sensible sartorial decisions are flung from the window, this propeller could quite literally take her places. (albeit, not likely anywhere heterosexual men are likely to frequent).


*I largely have Paul to thank after he circulated said images of me appearing more like a mental delinquent than a social butterfly, around our office. But on the plus side, at least I don't fall asleep standing up!)

If this picture wasn't enough to blow your eyeballs out of your sockets, some more hand-picked winners committing crimes against my eyeballs to tickle your tastebuds:

Dear Kate, you are beautiful, but your gargoyle-inspired ass-hattery is ludicrous, and you are killing me inside.

Asshats for as far as the eye can see.

pass the peroxide, sista!

**DISCLAIMER: Even though I didn't partake directly in the Melbourne Cup festivities, I will not argue against the champagne breakfast and half day of work we were granted..

la vie en rose

This week I've been thinking about:



Rose tinted glasses at Cacharel (by Sonny) - Katharine Ross - The Graduate - sixties eyeliner - d.i.y pink highlights - Anna Karina and the films of Jean-Luc Goddard - the works of Lucy Meyle - a sea of spring roses - the perfection of A Single Man - sixties interiors - Hanneli and her dusty-rose coloured Equipmentshirt - The apartment of Inès de la Fressange by The Selby -R

It's turban Time!

First Scott Schuman, now Time Magazine. The world just can't get enough of the KJ turban!

Gotta love a man with a good sense of tumour

And you thought this bulgy headwear was just a benign trend ey!?

This very sartorial NYC constructionista and his protuberant headwear was today featured by The Man Scott Schuman.

You heard it hear first, this trend is going viral.


(For those living on mars with their fingers in their ears whilst singing loudly, he's the fame behind The Sartorialist. Which is a website on this thing called a computer. Idiot)

Behold the Turban: a lesson of practicality

Every Sydneysider who's with it knows that Kirrily Johnston is Australia's answer to mecca for every self-respecting Man Offender.

It's just something about those long capes, chunky tribal jewellery the size of a small animal and most recently...

Behold: the turban that shits on all the others (all except for this one).



She don't need no man to keep her warm at night

She has succsesfully identified a gap in the market - as no doubt each and every one of us has a deep-seated hankering for headwear that closely resembles a tumour.


This is perfect for my work Christmas party!

I'll be jumping hurdles to wear a turban so large this weekend. It would at least serve the purpose of:
1. Storing my goodies
2. Repelling

I wonder if this is what KJ had in mind? If so, how thoughtful of her, creating something both aesthetically pleasing and PRACTICAL!

I bet girlfriend here is storing all manner of objects up in there.

I speculate turban wearing comes in handy for one (or more) of these reasons:

1: A gigantic head has the added benefit of minimising a body to teensy tiny proportions.
2: By rebelling against social norms she is critiquing the social landscape and oppressive nature in which we live.. (or something...)
3: A small but mighty army of elves have taken up residence within.
4: She's concealing a massive stash of cocaine baby
5: She has an aversion to sex, which she hopes to convey by wearing garments likely to offend men.
6: She's got a South Dowling Sandwich in there. She's either saving it for later or hiding it from her jealous coworkers in the guise of avant-garde tendencies.

Whatever the reason, this is something we want in on!

Out of simple curiosity, we decided to take a leaf out of KJ's fashion pages.



Only inside the confines of home, we promised ourselves.

I'm avant garde chic

KJ would be so proud

But hey, we thought. Since we've gone to all this effort, why not get a bang for our buck and take it to the streets.

We just couldn't resist..

There we were, turban-clad, roaming the streets of Chippendale and making a trip to our local bottle 'O.


We couldn't help but draw stares from passersby and shop owners. Despite this we discovered wearing turbans is addictive... so stay tuned...

In other news:
Will you be my turban wearing man friend?



Are you questioning my taste in men?

You wouldn't be the first...

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employer repeller du jour

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